Laura's Strengthening Marriage Blog

It can be complicated to try to figure out all the right ingredients for a woman to experience an orgasm. Many women have tried almost everything they can imagine. Maybe they are missing one necessary ingredient…

Because every woman and every relationship is so different I thought I’d start compiling a running list here of things couples might try to bring about orgasm. Most of these suggestions are things that have specifically helped couples I’ve counseled.

So, gook luck in your sexual adventures, and let us know what suggestions have been most helpful. We’d love to have readers share their secret sexual ingredients as well if they are willing! ; )

Orgasm Helps and Hints

1. Remember for women sex is a decision, so make the decision to go there!
2. Read And They Were Not Ashamed and do the homework at the end of each chapter to clear out as many inhibiting issues as you can on your own and/or with your spouse.
3. Initiate sex instead of being the more passive recipient of his sexual advances.
4. Take the lead sexually. A woman ultimately needs to be in charge of her orgasm to be sure she is getting what she needs. Husbands do play a big role not only in providing the physical/sexual stimulation that a woman needs, but also they are a key to the mental and emotional foreplay that she needs.
5. Be sure you and your husband have specifically read chapters 3, 4 and 5 of my book And They Were Not Ashamed so that you both understand the intricacies of a woman’s sexual wiring and the differences between a husband and a wife’s sexual wiring.   Continue reading “Orgasm’s Secret Ingredients” »

Good Girls Don’t

One of the trends I continue to see in my work with couples is that there is still an ingrained belief and something of a cultural norm that says, “Good girls don’t.”

The idea is that good girls shouldn’t think about sex. Or that good girls don’t do sex, which prior to marriage is true. But the problem occurs when that gets carried over into marriage.

Continue reading “Good Girls Do!” »

“The Dating Divas” SPECIAL of just $9 (continued thru 4/28) your copy of Laura’s book –
And They Were Not Ashamed!

Click here to listen to the tele-seminar recording 
(80 mins/30 mins of Q&A at the end)

Here are the presentation slides and related information for my “Three Keys to Spicing Up Your Sexual Relationship” tele-seminar (Wed, Apr 18, 2012) for The Dating Divas “Successful Marriages” Tele-Retreat. For more information click here!

Be sure you are registered here (or here) to get the call-in information and access to the recording after the seminar! Click here to listen to the tele-seminar recording (or here). I believe it is just $1 to register for a two-week trial membership of The Dating Divas Community!

1. SLIDES — Follow the seminar presentation outline at Laura’s Strengthening Marriage Blog
2. BOOK — Get Laura’s Book – And They Were Not Ashamed—Strengthening Marriage through Sexual Fulfillment — Just $9 (50% off)
3. CONNECT — Find Us on Facebook
• Strengthening Marriage, Inc. http://www.facebook.com/StrengtheningMarriage
• The Marital Intimacy Show http://www.facebook.com/MaritalIntimacyShow
4. PODCAST — The Marital Intimacy Show — Quick List of all Episodes
• www.TheMaritalIntimacyShow.com
5. NEWSLETTER – “Straight Talk about Strengthening Marriage”

  Continue reading “Spicing Up Your Sexual Relationship — Laura’s “Dating Divas” Tele-Retreat Seminar” »

Living your sexual truth in marriage allows you to be more fully alive, more fully functioning as the multi-dimensional person you were divinely designed to be. God designed each of us as sexual beings. We must embrace that fact. It’s not only our marital relationship, but also our personal wholeness that is at stake.

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Living Your True Self

I recently attended a workshop about discovering and embracing your true self. It was an eye opening, and amazingly confirming and transforming experience. It was incredible to feel the difference when you truly accept and come home to who you are and live your truth more fully.

Continue reading “Embracing Sexuality” »

Wondering about the discrepancy between the many women who dress provocatively in public and the many wives who struggle to share themselves freely with their spouses in the bedroom, one husband asked, “Does it take more confidence for a woman to dress revealingly in public, or to dress revealingly in her bedroom for her husband?”

What do you think?

The Bait and Switch

This question reminds me of the many men who feel that their wives were very passionate and affectionate before marriage then found that that didn’t translate into their marriage relationship. One husband even called it a “bait and switch.”

It’s my contention that women don’t mean to do this on purpose. They are simply poorly prepared for a healthy sexual relationship in marriage and often don’t understand the message and consequences of their flirty behavior.

Continue reading “Sexual Self-Confidence” »

Those amazing women at The Dating Divas have put together a one-of-a kind debut event to strengthen marriages — The Dating Divas “Successful Marriages” Tele-Retreat! Best of all — it’s FREE! — and you can participate right from the comfort of your own HOME.

On Wednesday, April 18th, 2012 at 6 p.m. (PST) or 7 p.m. (Mountain Time) I will be sharing some insights regarding “Spicing up Your Sexual Relationship.” Other amazing experts in love and marriage will be sharing their advice and experience throughout the week of April 16-20 as well. Rumor has it that there will also be some free gifts, so don’t miss out! : )

Register today by clicking here! You’ll find all kinds of great information and see all the fabulous presenters and their fun tele-seminar topics.

Over 1000 participants have already registered so don’t delay!

 Related Resources:

• Click here for the tele-seminar presentation slides!

Continue reading “The Dating Divas — Successful Marriages Tele-Retreat” »

Right up at the top of the list of things I get asked about the most are all of the what’s okay and what isn’t types of questions. I have addressed this topic fairly extensively in the writings mentioned below, but I do have a few additional thoughts for people to consider as they work together as husband and wife to determine what is right for them and what is in keeping with God’s plan for sexual relations in marriage.

Continue reading “What’s Okay and What Isn’t Sexually?” »

The following is an email from a woman who shares her experience with feeling rejected sexually, and how it changed her perspective on many things about sex and the marriage relationship. We appreciate her willingness to share her insights.

Dear Laura,

I think I have just had a tiny glimpse into how men feel when they’re wives are not interested in sex. My husband has been very busy with work and lots of things on his plate, and so have I.

Last night I suggested we go for it! He almost seemed a bit surprised that I was seriously offering. He replied that he didn’t really want a quickie, as I guess that’s what he thought I was suggesting.

Continue reading “A Taste of What Men Feel” »

Sexual intimacy is as important for the health and vitality of the marriage relationship as is emotional closeness and spiritual connection. Sexual nourishment that feeds both husband and wife is the dessert of married life.

Strengthening your marriage intimately — emotionally, spiritually and sexually — is one of the most important efforts in which you can put your time and energy. So-called desire discrepancies between husband and wife can be a thing of the past, as couples come to understand the intricacies of intimacy and mutual sexual fulfillment.  Continue reading “Six Tips to Strengthen Your Marriage Sexually” »

In working with couples it is quite evident that men and women each assign different meaning to lovemaking. It is common, and not terribly surprising that many women do not fully understand the nature of the sexual relationship from a man’s perspective. To be fair, men have a difficult time comprehending the nature of the sexual relationship from a woman’s perspective as well.

Sex is the Highest Form of Love

For women, having sex does not necessarily equate with feeling love. That seems to be a learned behavior. For a majority of women, it’s just not the primary way (or initial way) they feel love.

Not true for a man. For many if not most men sex is the epitome of love. Most wives would be hard pressed to find a better way to express their love to their husbands than by willingly and enthusiastically engaging in sexual intimacy with them. Continue reading “What Sex Means to a Man” »