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We welcome your comments about our books and CDs, this website, our newsletters, and author events, etc. If you would like to post a question for feedback or discussion, please post it on our "Open Forum Discussions" page at "Laura's Strengthening Marriage Blog."
I just finished listening to your latest podcast on overcoming the good girl syndrome. Beautifully done! :0) My favorite part was "get rid of all the crappy thoughts..." LOL. I think you're right about telling people that they need to get your book and start using the tools you provide in there. They really aren't going to re-program their thoughts until they start doing the exercises. I noticed that Dr. Laura Berman uses a very similar approach to what you preach, but I find that your program is more complete and has a less worldly approach. Knowing how to teach people how to have correct attitudes towards sex is a tough mountain to climb. You are an inspiration. Bravo.
Subject:
Thank you
Date:
July 16 2010
Name:
Holly
Comments:
Thank you for all the research and work you put into "And they were not ashamed." This book and the words within it are helping to change my view on my marriage and my role as a woman and wife. I recently gifted this book to my brother's fiance. Thankyou for being so detailed and for referencing such a wide range of sources. I would like to say more but don't want to gush too much ;-) You're wonderful.
Subject:
Mormon Times Article
Date:
July 12 2010
Comments:
I agree COMPLETELY with the fact that women who obsess over 'chick-flick' type movies/books/television, are wasting time and being self-centered. Sadly, you didn't mention the fact that many women try to find comfort in 'fake' men because so many husbands start the marriage with unreal 'expectations' of their wives and often, porn. Porn is a REAL problem that often begins before the male is married.
Subject:
The Twilight Obsesson and the Effects on Marriage
Date:
July 2 2010
Name:
Jason
Comments:
I just read your article on the Twilight Obsession on Meridian Magazine online's website. All I can say is "Right On!!!". I fortunately have a wife who is obsessed with me and the kids and not that trash. But I've seen the crazyness first hand. I was trying to schedule some training for our cub scout den leaders put on by the Scouting District Executive and was told by one of the den mothers that the date that I had picked wouldn't work because the new Twilight movie was coming out. My response was that the movie was playing all day and we were only looking at an hour or two of training leaving plenty of time to go see the movie that day or even the next one. I was told that it wouldn't work because the movie theater was showing all the movies in order and she was attending all of them. Another woman chimed in that she had the same conflict. So now I'm left to wonder that if these two women are so obsessed with the Twilight franchise that they have to watch all the movies in order, how their spouses and children are treated. I have other stories of the Twilight obsession and wonder how seemingly normal women can get so caught up in a book and movie series. If I spent that much time and attention on someone or something outside my wife and kids, I'm sure I would be branded a bad person but society is telling these women that what they do is just fine.
Subject:
And They Were Not Ashamed
Date:
July 1 2010
Name:
Stephanie
Comments:
I am a follower of Love Actually and she was telling about your book And They Were Not Ashamed book/cd giveaway, it sounds amazing! I have enjoyed looking around your site, and look forward to checking out some of your resources!!
Subject:
Required reading
Date:
June 29 2010
Name:
Emil Harker
Comments:
Thanks for writing this book! It should be required reading in order to get married! As a sex therapist who works with couples that struggle in this area, you save people so much money in expenses because of the foundation you create in the hearts and minds of the men and women that have read your book. Bless you!
Subject:
Love, Actually Blog Book Giveaway
Date:
June 29 2010
Name:
Jamie
Comments:
I qualify for the "And They Were Not Ashamed" book giveaway seen on the Love, Actually blog based on meeting criteria 1 and 2.
Subject:
Buy, read and apply
Date:
June 28 2010
Name:
Chris
Comments:
If you are wanting the best marriage possible, buy, read and apply this book... it has the information and inspiration to enable you to lift your marriage to the next level, and the level beyond that...
Subject:
Thank you!
Date:
June 25 2010
Comments:
Laura, you're awesome! I've read your book, listened to all your podcasts, etc. You've helped me a lot. I understand my wife better. I can empathize with her better, and not be so selfish. Our relationship is better because of it. Hopefully I'll be blessed by her listening to or reading the book one day! She's got the "good girl syndrome" in a bad way. Even if not, I've been blessed. Thank you!
Subject:
Thank you
Date:
June 24 2010
Name:
Terry
Comments:
Just wanted to say thank you for opening the windows in my mind, and helping me break free of the darkness and despair of my Good Girl Prison! It has been so long now since I thought that way. It seems foreign to me now. That is the miracle, because for a few years it was all I could do to keep the Good Girl Syndrome from overpowering me.
Subject:
Where have you been?
Date:
June 24 2010
Comments:
I just found your websites (www.StrengtheningMarriage.com and www.TheMaritalIntimacyShow.com)! Where have you been all my married life?! ;-)
Subject:
Great material
Date:
June 22 2010
Name:
D.M.
Comments:
I read your book and have listened to all your podcasts and I think you have produced some really great material.
I have been "wandering the marital desert" for a number of years now and I know there are relationship issues behind our lack of intimacy and have been educating myself and working hard on those problems. I just wish my wife was more interested in working on these things. I hope things will change someday 'cuz I'm not sure how long I can go with things as they are.
Subject:
Finally!
Date:
June 22 2010
Comments:
I want to thank you for your book, "And They Were Not Ashamed." Finally, a book writen by a woman, someone I can trust. I so appreciated you helping me to become what I want to be in my marriage realtionship. I am eternally grateful.
Subject:
Thank You
Date:
April 29 2010
Comments:
Thank you for taking a positive approach to intimacy. Our family had dealt with pornography addictions. Needless to say, I had a lot of misconceptions about intimacy. I had seen a lot of pain. Through some emotional healing and counseling, I have personally found what a gift intimacy can be. It can bind us as couples, it can be healing, and it is a wonderful gift! I think our youth also need to hear the positive aspects too. Strong marriages, strong families, etc. Thank you for taking a positive and respectful approach. It is something we need to hear. My marriage is stronger because I make intimacy a priority. Thank you.
Subject:
The Impact of a lack of intimacy
Date:
April 28 2010
Comments:
I just read your brief article about intimacy and its importance within a marriage. This article appeared in the Meridian Magazine newsletter that I get daily. Permit me to share some insights.
First, I have been married twice. The first marriage ended in a divorce after 9 years of marriage. The bottomline was that my first wife decided she no longer wanted to be married and no longer wanted to be LDS. It was a painful period.
My second marriage has gone now for 19 years. My second wife is a much better person than my first wife in so many ways I cannot count. However, both have a similar problem
My first wife used sexual relations--intimacy--as a tool and a weapon. If I met her conditions we could have intimacy. If I did not, and her conditions changed frequently, we did not. It was miserable. But, knowing that gospel doctrine frowns on divorce, and having children I was concerned about I stuck it out. Eventually, she filed for divorce and things went from bad to very much worse.
My second wife is, in most areas, the absolute antithesis of my first wife. She has a strong vibrant testimony. (She is a returned missionary I might add, so if any young unmarried man is reading this don't overlook returned sister missionaries as marriage prospects!) She has stuck it out through thick and thin and there has been a lot of thin. However, outside of the first year of our marriage physical intimacy has become something she seems to work to avoid. I have tried talking to her about this and things go no where. I have read a lot of articles about this and have found no help. I have pleaded with her to discuss this with her doctor. She will not. In the end, because this has caused such friction between us and marred an otherwise wonderful relationship, I have resorted to self-suppression. Yes, I suppress my sexual urges almost 100% of the time. It is not easy, but it avoids the other problems. Doing this has had its consequences. I am resentful of what she has imposed on me and on us. I feel robbed of what we could have had. I suffer from depression and am impotent--at least when conscious and awake. I have discussed my problem with my doctor and although he feels a prescription could help with my physical impotence he points out that doing so would be pointless if my wife does not want physical intimacy. Mind you she wants the hugs, the kisses, the holding her close, but would really prefer that things not go any further. My doctor also suggests that my impotence is strongly affected by wife's attitude and my self-suppression.
What can a loving husband do if his wife has zero interest in physical intimacy and does not experience sexual arousal nor seems to want to? I am 54 and she is 48 so we are not yet old geezers but time is running out to fix this problem.
